Baby Fill and a Little Gift I Left My Brother

Good Afternoon Everyone!

I just thought I would check in and report that I had fill number 3 yesterday.  It was a little one compared to the first 2 (4CCs and 1.4CCs) .  This time, Dawn the fabulous PA, just gave me .2CCs.  I had a lot of sliming after the last fill (although the last couple of weeks I have been able to eat more normally again).  So she thought it would be best just to "top me off" and see how if goes.  So far, so good.  I really am grateful to have a wonderful PA who really knows what she is doing giving me my fills.  It takes a lot of stress out of the situation.

I am so hoping this fill will help me break through my plateau.  I have been kissing onderland (got down to 200.9 last week before bouncing back to 202) for several weeks.  Unfortunately, this is the weight that I plateaued at the last couple of times I seriously dieted and I am wondering if I have some kind of mental block or if I am self-sabataging.  I really, really, want to get below 200 so I can feel like I am making this band work for me.  I have not been below 200 since 2007 so it is a huge goal for me. 

In order to try to break my plateau, I rejoined my old gym last week.  I went last week and lifted weights on my own and did some cardio.  Back in the day, I used to be quite the gym rat so I have a number of old weight lifting routines from when I worked out with a trainer.  I thought it couldn't hurt to recycle them.  Monday I went and took a class called "Group Centergy".  It is a mix of yoga and pilates with some squats and lunges thrown in.  Kind of an interesting combo but it must have done the trick because my legs have been screaming at me ever since.  I am going back to that class tomorrow night.  Tonight I am taking Balletone. 

On another note, I thought I would post a few pictures of a little present I left my big brother when I was in San Francisco remodeling his daughter's room (pics in earlier post).  My brother is pretty territorial when it comes to his man cave/office (which is really no cave since it is on the 3rd floor of the house).  Anyway, I have been begging him for years to let me spruce it up and trick it out but he won't let me touch it.  (I'm sure he is worried that I am going to find some hidden porn stash or something).  Anyway, just because he won't let me "do" his room doesn't mean I couldn't leave a little something behind to remind him that I am thinking of him.  Meet kitty.

Just Hanging Out

 Above your desk

 To remind you that your sister was here

And since we all know how unobservant guys can be sometime, I just put it there to wait and see how long it would take him to notice.  Let's just say, he was surprised :-)

Hope everyone is having a great week!

(You can click on the pictures if you want to see them bigger.  I love the cat's expression.)



What I Did on My Vacation. Plus - Word of the Year and BYOC

Hi All,

I have been amazingly lazy lately when it comes to blogging.  I finally caught up on everyone elses and I have been commenting here and there although not nearly enough.  Hope you can forgive me for being such a slacker.

 

Some of you may remember that I was going to remodel my niece's bedroom for her Birthday/Christmas present.  Well,  guess what I did for my vacation????  From Dec. 26-31 I shopped, built furniture, stenciled, installed and decorated.  I took my mother to San Francisco with me to be my assistant.  We had a good time and I think it turned out pretty well.  Here are some before and after pics for your viewing enjoyment.

Before

 After

 Bed Before

 Bed After

 Bay Window Before

 Bay Window After

 Before

 After

 Before

 After

 Before

 After

 And some of the little details:

 Bamboo Stencil

 Ledge Detail

Magnetic Boxes

 

I left the day before they returned from vacation but I understand that she really likes it.

I've been thinking alot about my my word for this year should be.  I know it is not terribly original but I have settled on (drum roll please)

 

Perseverance 

per·se·ver·ance   

–noun

1.steady persistence in a course of action, a purpose, a state, etc., esp. in spite of difficulties, obstacles, or discouragement.

2. Theology . continuance in a state of grace to the end, leading to eternal salvation.

 

—Synonyms
1.  doggedness, steadfastness. Perseverance, persistence, tenacity, pertinacity  imply resolute and unyielding holding on in following a course of action. Perseverance  commonly suggests activity maintained in spite of difficulties or steadfast and long-continued application: Endurance and perseverance combined to win in the end.  It is regularly used in a favorable sense. Persistence,  which may be used in either a favorable or an unfavorable sense, implies unremitting (and sometimes annoying) perseverance: persistence in a belief; persistence in talking when others wish to study. Tenacity,  with the original meaning of adhesiveness, as of glue, is a dogged and determined holding on. Whether used literally or figuratively it has favorable implications: a bulldog quality of tenacity; the tenacity of one's memory. Pertinacity,  unlike its related word, is used chiefly in an unfavorable sense, that of overinsistent tenacity: the pertinacity of the social climber.

I have been struggling with very slow weight loss.  I know that because I started my journey at a lower BMI than many of my fellow bloggers that my weight loss might be slower.  However, that doesn't make this any less frustrating and in the past, this is where I would have bailed on my weight loss efforts.  However, with the band, I have a much larger incentive to work through my frustration and successfully meet my goals.  But is it going to take PERSEVERANCE.  That is what I will concentrate on this year and hopefully, keeping that in mind, I will meet my goals.

Finally, I thought I would participate in Draz's BYOC.  Thanks, Draz!

1.  If you could have only three electrical items/appliances...what would they be?  (Um...whose gonna be the first to say you know what?  (Perverts - all of you!!))

1. My TV.  So sad to admit but I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE my TV.  I am a true child of the 70s.  I am addicted to Reality show competitions - Amazing Race, Top Chef, Project Runway, etc.  So, can't give up my beloved TV.  Plus, TV is how I make my living so I really can't do without.
2. My laptop.  How would I blog otherwise?  How would I research effectively?  How would I keep up with all of you wonderful folks without it?  Yep, laptop is definitely a keeper.
3. VitaMix.  I have a protein shake for breakfast every morning for breakfast. I could always eat out or order out every other meal so I think I could live without a fridge and range - but not my VitaMix.

(oh, and Draz, that is  battery operated ;-)

2.  What do you think Satan's middle name is? 

Dick

3.  Name two things you are VERY good at.  (Again - can't wait for these answers)

1. Organization.  I love to organize.  When I had my interior design company one of the things I loved to do was go in and help people purge and organize their spaces.  I can throw things out, donate, sell, whatever with the best of 'em.  I hate clutter!
2. I'm a great friend.  I love my friends passionately.  If we are friends, I will do almost anything for you (as long as it doesn't involve enabling unhealthy behaviors - think alcoholism, etc.).  I'll support you, provide a shoulder to cry on, be your biggest cheerleader, bring you soup when you are sick, laugh with you, cry with you, come to your Tupperware (or whatever you are selling) parties, tell you how beautiful, wonderful, strong and smart that you are.  I'm a good, true and honest friend.

4.  What is your favorite sundae topping?

Hot, hot fudge.  Nummy!!!!

5.  Summarize your life in blog land and in real life this week.

 

I've been up and down.  Earlier this week, I hit my all time low (1 pound from onederland).  But now I am back up a pound.  It has been slow and frustrating.  Part of it is due to poor choices on my part.  I have not been as diligent as I could be.  On the other hand, I have not gorged or even over-eaten anything (my band is way to tight for that).  But I think part of it is that this is a weight I have plateaued at before.  The last 2 times I dieted, this is where I got stuck and ultimately gave up.  I will not give up this time because my new word is PERSEVERANCE!

 

I also rejoined my old gym this past week.  It is only 1 mile from my new job so I am hoping to make it there at least 4 times per week,  I also got 2 personal training sessions and one Pilates reformer class included in my enrollment so I will be meeting with my trainer next week.  Yippee!

 

I promise I will try to be a more consistent blogger.  Thanks to everyone for their continued support.  I do appreciate it. 

Gratitude

It's been a while since my last post.  I have been so busy with work and life that I have had a hard time coming up with anything interesting to write about.  Perhaps this is a good time to give a shout out for all the things I am grateful for.  So, with no further ado, here goes...

Things I'm Grateful For

(in no particular order)

• Followers.  I noticed this morning that I have a new follower which means that I now have 60!  This is really exciting for me.  I truly appreciate the support and advice that I receive from your comments as well as from following all of your blogs. Sometimes it is easy to feel all alone when you are going through this and knowing that I have an army of sisters (mostly - I think there are a couple of guys) out there going throught the same thing is somehow comforting and helps sustain me when I am feeling frustrated with my slow losses, or have questions about what I am experiencing. You all make me laugh, you make me cry, and you educate me in ways that I did not know were possible.  So, this year, I am grateful for all of you.
• Weight loss.  I lost a whopping  1/2 lb. this week.  It is not a lot, but given the endless orgy of food I am surrounded by at my office lately from homemade fudge and cookies to catered lunches and cocktail parties it is a small miracle that I have not gained.  I give a great deal of credit to my band for keeping me in check.  I am still trying to determine if I am over-filled but I suppose if there was a time to be, this is it.
• My job.  After struggling through 9 months of job hunting and endless interviews it is nice to finally have somewhere stable to come every day.  I work with a great bunch of people who are good at what they do and are easy to get along with.  That is a small miracle in and of itself.
• My family and friends.  Yes, they may be crazy and they stress me out on ocassion, but I know they are my biggest supporters.  I know that when I am in a jam, I can count on them to help me out or provide a comforting word.  And, while I have only shared my news about the band with my mother, husband and best friend, I know that many more would be supportive if I let them in.  I just guess I have to go at my own pace.
• The roof over my head, clothes on my back, food on the table, and the car that I drive.  While I might hate - and curse - my location (I now have a 75 mile round trip commute to the office every day) I have to be grateful for the shelter, the warmth, and the comfort of having a home and all the things I need when there are so many out there that are struggling to keep or find the same thing.  I would be supremely arrogant of me not to recognize how fortunate I am to have the things I have.  It is my most fervent wish that everyone be so blessed.  

And, as much as I like this time of year because I think it provides a wonderful opportunity to reflect on all our many blessings, I am really looking forward to the new year and not having quite so many temptations staring me in the face.  So, perhaps one of the thing I am most grateful for is that this smorgasborg will end soon!

I hope you all are having a wonderful Monday as we approach the last couple of weeks of this holiday season.  What are you grateful for???

Yep - I feel like a FRAUD!

So, I have been meaning to write this post for over a week now.  I have a confession to make.  I feel like such a fraud!  I am such a whoos (sp?) about telling anyone I had lapband surgery that I joined the new Weight Watchers at Work program to act as a cover for my weight loss.  That way (I figure) I don't have to explain myself to people when they start noticing my weight loss.  Is that just totally horrible?  I am not counting points - although the new point system does seem to reward healthier eating habits.  I am still working on following the basic tenents of banded eating:

• Protien first, then veggies, then carbs (if there is room)
• No liquids with meals and for 30 minutes after
• 1 cup of food at each meal (that is still tough though getting better)
• No snacking between meals (that is the really tough part!)
• No drinking my calories (although I have been having a protien shake for breakfast most mornings as that is the easiest thing for me to do given my commute)
• Eat slow, small bites, chew, chew, chew
• etc.

I have only told a few people about my band - my husband, my mother and my best friend.  I wish I had the guts to be a huge advocate of the band and didn't mind telling everyone I had it, but I just started a new job.  I don't know these people.  I don't know how they would react.  Whether or not they will judge me or simply not understand.  I am envious of you guys out there that just don't care what anyone else thinks.  I know that one of my problems is that I let others perceptions of me effect me too much.  I was reading catherine55's blog the other day and she mentioned that she has a whole story cooked up to explain her surgical scars and port if she is not ready to divulge to someone that she has the band.  I am assuming that this is relatively common amongst us.  It is sad to me that WLS still carries such a stigma and that there are so many misunderstanding and/or judgements about it.  (It is almost as bad as the stigma attached to mental illness and depression.)  But I figure this is an intervention and tool I chose for myself after a lot of research and many years of yo-yo dieting.  But I also recognize this is a choice many people will not understand and may in fact ridicule.

So, yes, I have joined Weight Watchers for the 8th time (I think it is).  Only this time they are only my beard.  I hope that doesn't make me a horrible person.

Down only 2.3 lbs since my fill.  I am still trying to determine whether or not I need a bit of an unfill but I think I will stick it out til my next appt. Jan. 17th.  I think since I was pretty able to eat most anything and developed some bad post-surgery habits of still eating too fast and taking larger bites (cause I could) that my problem may not be being over-filled but more that I am just not eating correctly.  Really working on the thoughtful eating and trying to see if things work themselves out.

Glad to see everyone is getting into the holiday spirit (for the most part).  I am looking forward to my time off at the end of the year!

Got Fill #2 Last Week

Got my second fill last Wednesday.  Started with 4CCs.  My oh-so-awesome PA, Dawn, had planned to put in 2 more but the needle started pushing back so I ended up with 1.6CCs.  However, after attempting to sip water, I started gurgling and we decided to take .2CCs out leaving me with a grand total of 5.4CCs in my 10CC band.

All in all the fill has been pretty good.  After going gangbusters in the weight loss dept. my first month, I really stalled out in month 2 only losing 1.4lbs.  Since the fill, I have lost another 2lbs.   I am hoping this is a sign of things to come.  Only thing is that I need to continuously remind myself to eat sssslllllloooooowwwllllllyyyyyyyy.  I have gotten stuck and slimed more times in the last few days than I have in the last 2 months.  I believe this is al due to finally have some restriction now and not quite knowing how to work it.  Things are getting better though.

In other news, I did my 10K on Sunday in solidarity with Christine over at www.PhoenixRevolution.net.  It wasn't bad.  I definitely need to set more fitness goals to get me moving!  Thanks for the challenge, Christine.

Next blog, I will be telling you why I feel like such a fraud.  Tune in then.

Traveling with the Band

Happy holidays fellow bloggers!  I feel like quite the loser these days.  I haven't blogged for a couple of weeks.  I  have been reading everyone elses but didn't feel like I had much to share about myself.

My weight seems to have plateaued ever since I got my first fill. Not exactly the result I was expecting.  I am trying to be patient and many of you have reminded me that I am in Bandster Hell but it is still discouraging when I see others that were banded around my date who have already lost 20 lbs.  I will admit that the green eyed-monster takes over and I get a little jealous.

I arrived in San Fransisco this morning.  Some of you might remember that I am re-decorating my niece's bedroom for her birthday/XMas (for several years) gift.  We are doing some shopping tomorrow to look at furniture (IKEA) and I am meeting with the contractor to find out what it is going to cost me to have the painting done and the window seat built.  I'll be flying back here the day after Christmas to actually do the job while she is in India for the holidays with her parents.

Anywhooo.  A couple of hours after arriving we (my brother, niece and I) decided to go get lunch.  That was good because I was definitely hungry - it being 2:30pm my (Denver) time.  (Keep in mind, my brother knows nothing about the band.)  As we started to decide where to go, I tried to steer us toward options where I knew I could get protien.  Somehow we ended up at a Vietnamese noodle place.  Trying to be good, I ordered the Curry Chicken and Garlic Noodles (knowing that I would not be able to eat the noodles but at least I could get some chicken in a sauce.  I took my first bite (a small one) and instantly had that burning feeling in my chest.  I kept trying to figure out if I was going to PB or Slime - both of which I have never done but certainly didn't want my first episode at a little restarant on Irving St. in San Fran.  I finally excused myself and went to the bathroom to wait it out.  Nothing came up, and soon the pain ceased.  I headed back to the table and pushed my food around for a while taking small bites here and there.  My brother asked me why I was taking so long and I just said I was trying to eat more slowly these days (which is true).  I got about 1/3 of the chicken down and a couple of bites of noodles.  I am thinking that maybe the flying made my band tighter.

Tonight I had some salmon and a small amount of mashed potatoes and veggies.  That seemed to go a little easier.  We'll see how the rest of the trip plays out and whether or not I am going to be forced to fess up.

Thanksgiving was good.  I had small portions of turkey (about 2-3 oz.), mashed potatoes, stuffing, and a very small sliver of cherry pie.  Again, my band slowed me waaaaay down and I did not (could not) over eat.  So, I do know my band is doing it's job, just not optimally at this point.  I am getting impatient for the big losses and I know they will come.  I do think I am probably going to be one of those slow losers though.  I guess that is acceptable as long as the scale starts moving down again.  I am scheduled for my next fill on Wed. the 1st.  Hopefully, that will jump start something and get me past this plateau.

Off to do some more reading.  I will take some "before" pictures of the room so I can post them later with the "after" shots.

Ciao for now!

Libby

Weekly Weigh In

Well, I bit the bullet and stepped on the scale.  As I suspected, I am up 1.1 lbs from last week.  I know that I have not been eating perfectly.  Too many treats.  Not listening to my body hunger signals.  These are old, bad habits and it is going to take a lot more than Fiona (my band) to help me get over them.  The more discouraging part is that I realized when updating my ticker that even though I have lost 12.7 lbs since I started down this banded road Oct. 4th, I have only lost 2.2 since 10/9.  I have been hoping to average a 10lb. loss per month and at this rate, that is not likely.  I think this is really a message that I have to button up and fly by the band eating rules.  Not easy, but it is doable.  I am certainly hoping for more restriction tough when I get my second fill on Dec. 1 to help me out.

Hope everyone is having a wonderful weekend and better success than I have had this week.

Off to read your blogs!