Wednesday, July 20, 2011

De-Fill...Un-Fill

I have been reading a lot of blogs lately to try and catch up and noticed at Jen - plus many others - had posted a very helpful graph on their blogs describing the Red, Green and Yellow zones.  If I am to answer the questions honestly, I would have to say that I am definitely too full.  And, like Jen, I have a huge fear of getting a de-fill and gaining weight.  On the other hand, I am not losing any weight right now so what do I have to lose, right?  Anything has to be better than sliming 70% of the time.  I just never know what is going to go down and what isn't even when I chew, chew, chew.  So, I have decided that this is probably the best course of action.  I want all those pre-band promises fulfilled.  The if-you-eat-right-you-will-be-satiated promise.  The no-more-cravings-between-meals promise.  The problem today is that half the time I try to eat protein like chicken - or even tuna salad - I am in spitting, sliming hell.  This makes me turn to the easy sliders for comfort and satiation.  Not good.  Especially when I am in the mood to comfort myself with food anyway.

Given this little analysis, I called my doctor's office today to make an appt. with the wonderful Fill Whisperer, Dawn, for an un-fill/de-fill (whatever we are calling it).  And what do I find out????  She has left the practice!  Taken a job in Aspen (I am assuming to be with the new boyfriend).  HORRORS!!!!  I love Dawn!  I have a relationship with Dawn.  She is the only one who has ever done a fill on me.  I have never developed a relationship with my surgeon outside of the operating room.  He's a nice guy, but he doesn't like doing fills and my understanding is that he is not very good at it.  Now, I know he will be taking fluid out - he can't f*** that up too much, but what about long term?  What if I don't like Dawn's replacement (who is supposed to start in August)?  Bloody hell!  Can my week... month... year... get any better????  Can SOMETHING not change right now??  And I know, I probably sound like a whiny, high maintenance bore right about now (I feel like it).  It seems like all I can blog about is how shitty things are.  I need out of this funk.  I am not a complainer by nature.  I am just completely overwhelmed right now.  I need affirmations, or meditation, or a huge cocktail.  I know that all this too shall pass.  I just wish it would be sooner rather than later.

On a slightly happier note, I picked my dog up from the hospital this afternoon.  I had to take her to emergency last night because she didn't seem able to breath and she fainted again (which really freaks me out).  Turns out she has chronic lung disease and some heart issues caused by that.  BUT, the good news is that it is treatable with long term, permanent medications (which will only cost me roughly $100 month).  She appears to be a good candidate and it is possible that I will be able to have her around for a good while longer as long as she responds well to the meds.  So, there is that.  I have my baby and I don't have to think about her going anywhere for a while.

So, wish me luck with the de-fill.  My appt. is tomorrow afternoon.  Perhaps I will get some relief and be able to start eating like a somewhat normal person again.

Thanks for listening to the rants.  I promise, it will get better.

Tuesday, July 19, 2011

Stress, stress and more stress

What's a girl to do?  After losing my beloved golden retriever last month, it looks like my sweet maltipoo, Lily, is sick.  Her breathing has been labored the last few days and it seems as though she fainted a couple of days ago.  The joy and the pain of having a small dog is that they seem like puppies forever.  So, although she is 13 now, I can only think of her as my "baby".  I am just not sure how I will handle one more piece of bad news at this point.  I already feeling like I am drowning in a sea of change.  Each morning I get up and promise myself I will do better today.  I will be stronger today.  More focused.  I will adhere to the rules of the band (yeah, right).  I will work out (uh huh). And I will pack a few more boxes (only if I am very lucky.)  I just can't seem to pull myself out of this rut of depression and inaction.  I feel like I have turned into a very large ostrich with it's head buried in the sand.  I just can't seem to move and now the possibility that my sweet girl is sick is almost too much to bare.

So, I have an appt. with the vet this afternoon.  I am trying not to get ahead of myself and predict the worst.  Sometimes it is the not knowing that drives me the craziest.  Hopefully, it is something minor - the heat, allergies, something treatable...  I have to hope for the best because the alternative is too much to consider.

My baby:

Wednesday, July 13, 2011

Blog Issues

I think the blog gods must be mad since I was gone so long.  For some reason, even after I sign in to my blog, I do not get the design, etc. buttons at the top or the editing buttons next to each of my boxes.  I also can't see my followers and I can't seem to see anyone elses (or their option to be followed).  What the heck am I doing wrong.  Just one more frustration in to add to the list.

I have also decided to change the name of my blog - but not change the link since I don't want to lose my followers (is that terribly vain?).  I just hate the idea of completely starting over but I do like the idea of a new name to go with the new me.  Plus, how many of us titled our blogs "This one time at band camp?"  I thought I was being so clever and pithy when I picked it only to discover that I wasn't the only one that liked the American Pie movies.  But now I feel I am entering a new stage of my life.  I am trying to find me after so many years of stifling my feelings and desires because they did not comport with those of my spouse.  I am on a quest to rediscover myself.  Relearn the things that will make me happy.  And, hopefully, become a healthier (both physically and mentally), happier person.

Now if I could just figure out while my blog doesn't work the way it used to!  Sheesh!

Happy humpday everyone!

Tuesday, July 12, 2011

I'm Baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaack - Kind of

Hello Fellow Banders (if there is anyone still out there following me)

I am so sorry for my prolonged absence.  I do need to get back to blogging for my own sanity and to stay honest about my journey.  I have been very, very bad.  But life sort of got in the way.  Since last I posted, I have:
  • filed for divorce (will be final the end of August)
  • found a new house that I will be closing on Aug. 3rd
  • been packing and preparing to move
  • lost my 15 yr. old golden retriever (the sweetest dog in the world) who passed away
  • not been following the band rules or working out
  • not been blogging or even reading blogs
In short, I've been a bit of a mess.  But I am finally starting to pull out and am starting to set some goals to get back on track and try to get me back.  I feel like I have been living in a fog for the last 7 years, and now is the time to rediscover myself and the things I want to do with my life.

So, my goals are:
  • close on the house
  • move and unpack
  • start a regular exercise routine
  • complete a 5 day pouch test (after the move)
  • re-commit to following the band eating rules
  • join Weight Watchers for some moral support
  • start blogging again on a regular basis
That's the plan.  Wish me luck.  I'm gonna need it :-)

Monday, March 28, 2011

I'm Still Here

And I'm still stuck.  I reached the magic 199 and stalled out.  I think it might have to do with some upheaval in my life.  Things have not been good for a while and my husband and I are talking about the "D" word.  Something needs to change, I'm just not sure what and when.  Needless to say, it makes it very hard to concentrate on doing the things I need to do for myself.  I need to get unstuck.  I need to move forward.  I need to start to take care of me again.  I need... a lot, I guess.

Monday, March 7, 2011

OMG! I'm tight!

Not sure if this is the result of the 5 Day Pouch Test but I am so tight I can barely eat solids.  This was not my problem a week ago.  Yesterday I went to brunch with a dear friend and after a few bites ended up in the bathroom sliming and hurling (I know - TMI).  It is hugely embarassing.  This friend does not know about my surgery and I am starting to run out of convincing excuses for major swaths of time being spent in the loo.  Today, my lunch does not want to go down.  The frustrating thing is that if I cannot eat anything healthy, I start to look for sliders later to get something down.  I guess I am just going to have to replace the unhealthy sliders with healthy ones like yogurt and cottage cheese.  Some days this band is so frustrating!

On another note, I have been thinking a lot lately about why it seems so much harder to lose weight in my 40s than it was in my 20s and 30s.  Other than my lovely perimenopausal self, I have some theorys and plan to write a blog about it soon.  So, stay tuned.  (That is if there is still anyone out there interested in my rantings ;-)

Saturday, March 5, 2011

Days 3-5, Still Stuck but Feeling Like I am Starting to Move Again

Well, I finally finished the 5 Day Pouch Test.  I think that days 3 and 4 were the hardest.  Oh hell, they all sucked.  Detoxing off of sugar is the worst, but it was a necessary evil.  I was not completely on task all days.  I did eat some almonds and pistachios on day 3 and 4.  I was just craving chocolate so badly I figured that if I was going to cheat, I should go for protein.  All in all, I do find that my cravings for chocolate have subsided significantly.  I am also feeling more in touch with my band.  I am eating more slowly and thoughtfully.  It is hard to tell if my band feels "tighter" but I am feeling more of a sensation of fullness after eating a small amount of food.  I do not think though that I am at my sweet spot yet.  I have an appointment in mid-April for a fill and I think I will be ready then.  Until then, I am committed to eating mindfully and slowly.

I just updated my ticker for this first time since mid-January.  Sadly, I have only lost .2 (that is point 2) pounds since then.  Even the 5 Day Pouch test does not seem to have cured my plateau.  However, I am feeling hopeful that this will jump start my efforts.  I am bound and determined to lose 40 lbs before my girl's trip to Brazil in October.

I am also really looking forward to BOOBs in Chicago.   

Tuesday, March 1, 2011

Day 2 - Trying to Become One with The Band

Day 2 of the Pouch Test is almost done and I am still struggling with chocolate cravings.  I could have gnawed  off a corner of my desk again today while avoiding the candy bowls at work.  I am still doing this via sheer willpower which leads me to believe that I am not at my sweet spot restriction-wise yet. (surprise)

Food Today:
B:  Orange Protein Shake (1 1/2 scoops protein powder, OJ, vanilla yogurt, ice - blended
S:  Sugar Free Jello Mousse pudding cup
L:  Creamy Tomato Soup
S:  Sugar Free Jello Mousse pudding cup
D:  Creamy Tomato Soup

I can't tell you how excited I am to eat tuna tomorrow.  It brings me back to my pre and post surgery days.  I am waiting to feel a difference band-wise or satiation-wise but nothing yet.  Hoping that I feel some difference when I re-introduce solids.

Monday, February 28, 2011

5 Day Pouch Test - Day One

Just finishing up Day 1 of the 5 Day Pouch Test.  Now I remember how real dieting feels - and I don't like it.  It took everything I had to pass the numerous candy dishes overflowing with chocolate and other tasty morsels in the office today.  I've been gritting my teeth most of the day and telling myself that I can do anything for 5 days.  This only goes to prove to me how completely addicted I am to carbohydrates I truly am.  I definitely need to do this not only to get myself back in touch with my pouch but to detox from the sliders I have slid back into snacking on.  So, thank you, Read.  I needed this.

I also have a new goal.  I am headed to Rio (in Brazil) for a girl's trip in late October.  I would like to lose 40lbs. before my trip.  That is roughly 5lbs per month and I think it is doable.  Hopefully, this little pouch test will be just what I need to get me back on track.

Saturday, February 26, 2011

Maintaining

Good morning fellow bloggers!.

Well, I finally stepped on the scale this morning after avoiding it for the last 4 weeks.  The bad news is I haven't lost anything more  The good news is I am not gaining either.  This is an old habit for me.  Once I start feeling like I am struggling, I start to avoid the scale because I don't want to face the music.  Pre-band, it usually meant a gain of 5-10lbs.  So, if nothing else, the band is restricting my ability to overeat.  Unfortunately, I have fallen back into the habit of snacking when I am stressed out.  I desperately need to work on my head hunger issues but am not even sure where to start.  I am constantly reminded that the band is not a magic bullet.  There is so much more work to do in terms of unlearning bad behaviors and dealing with the issues that got me here in the first place.

After reading Read's blog last week, I have decided that I need to do the 5 day pouch test if for no other reason than to reacquaint myself with the basics and detox from the carbs that call my name everyday around 3pm.  So, Sunday is going to be Day1.

Wish me luck.  I'm gonna need it!

Wednesday, February 23, 2011

ABCs of Me

So, since I am struggling to find anything profound to write about in terms of weight loss, working my band, tackling head hunger or formulating world peace I thought I would share the ABCs of me.

(A) Age: 46 (can't even believe that is possible.  I still feel like I am in my 30s.  Denial is a wonderful place to live)
(B) Bed Size: King - LOVE IT
(C) Chore You Hate: Picking up dog poop (especially in the summertime)
(D) Dogs?: 2 Golden Retrievers - Suva and Buffy (after the Vampire Slayer) and one Malti-Poo - Lily.
(E) Essential Start Your Day Item: Protein shake
(F) Favorite Color: Green
(G) Gold or Silver?: silver
(H) Height: 5' 8"
(I) Instruments You Play: I took piano lessons as a child but never practiced to I can only play 2 tunes
(J) Job Title: Sr. Manager - Project Management (otherwise known as a cat herder)
(K) Kids: See "D" above
(L) Live: I believe so.  If not, I am a reasonable facsimile of.
(M) Mom's Name: Debby
(N) Nicknames: Libby, E - anything but Liz!
(O) Overnight Hospital Stays?: This summer I spent a couple of nights in the hospital after a bike accident - the first for a pneumothorax then a few days later for pneumonia.  Prior to that, when I was 6 or 7 and had my tonsils out.  Both times the food sucked and I was bored out of my mind.
(P) Pet Peeve: Bad or aggressive drivers, hypocrites, liars, rude people, mean people and people who are cruel to animals, children or the elderly.  Gee, I have a lot of pet peeves!
(Q) Quote from a Movie: "Wilson!!!!!!!!!!!" (What's that from?)
(R) Right or Left Handed?: Right but I can write with either
(S) Siblings: 2 brothers, 1 sister, 2 half-sisters, 1 step-sister
(T) Time You Wake Up?: between 5:30 and 6am
(U) Underwear: No
(V) Vegetable You Dislike: Broccoli, Beets and Brussel Sprouts
(W) What Makes You Run Late: Wardrobe meltdowns.  Some days nothing looks good.
(X) X-Rays You've Had Done: Chest and Back (after bicycle accident), Teeth
(Y) Yummy Food You Make: Coq Au Vin, Chopped Mexacali Salad, Green Chili 
(Z) Zoo, Favorite Animal: Gorillas and Polar Bears

Sunday, February 20, 2011

BOOBs 2011

Have been a horrible blogger lately.  Work has been crazy busy and, quite frankly, my weight loss/band success has stalled out again.  So very frustrating although I felt a small bit of relief when I read Stephanie's (Dreams of Skinny High Heels) blog this week in which she said she didn't start to seriously start losing weight til the 7th month.

I am planning to attend the BOOBs get together in Chicago in Sept.  I am looking for a roommate so if anyone is so inclined, drop me an email!  Really looking forward to meeting everyone and putting faces to blogs!

Friday, February 4, 2011

Need to Rededicate My Efforts

So, I went ahead and had a mini unfill.  Dawn removed .1cc.  When she showed me what it looked like it was miniscule!  I really didn't see how that little bit could solve my sliming problems but voila! it did!!!!  Yesterday is the first time since early Dec. when I haven't PB'd or slimed once.  It is amazing what a small adjustment can do.  It has only been a couple of days, but I can't say I feel any increased hunger.  As a matter of fact, because I was able to eat more solidish food (had a fish burger made with tilapia and shrimp yesterday, no bun) and not slime I felt more satisfied and did not feel the need to supplement my food intake with sliders.  Today I have a renewed sense of hope that I can make this tool work for me and not against me.  It is wonderful to not feel as though I am warring with my body.
 
Thank you to everyone that provided input on my last post.  I really did think about everything you had to say and do feel like I have made the right decision for my body.  I do believe it is just as counter-productive to be over-filled as it is to be under-filled.  I am not sitting with 5.5 ccs in my 10 cc band.  This feels right for now.  Let's hope I can build on this momentum and get the scale moving again.
 
In an effort to become completely honest with myself about my food consumption and take responsibility for eating healthier and in a "band appropriate" way, I am going to log what I eat every day here.  I am also going to log my physical activity because it is important to both my physical and mental well being to move my body every day.

Friday, February 4, 2011
Food:
B =
Vanilla Premier Protien Shake with
frozen strawberries                                                       210 calories    30gr. protien
L =
4oz. tunafish salad with veggies and 1T light mayo         115 calories    28gr. protien
1oz. LaPanzanella Croccantini crackers                        110 calories      4gr. protien
1C. Tomato Basil Soup                                                150 calories      3 gr. protien
D =
1C homemade Green Chili                                             50 calores        0gr. protien
4oz. pork in green chili                                                 235 calories     32gr. protien
S =
Dole Fruit and Juice Bar                                                  50 calories     0gr. protien
                                                                      Totals =   920 calories     97gr. protien

Exercise:
Group Power Class (weight lifting)                                         1 hour
Treadmill                                                                              30 minutes

Thanks again to everyone for the wonderful support.  It does help.

Tuesday, February 1, 2011

To Fill or Not To Fill

That is the question.

I have been struggling since my second fill but shortly before my 3rd fill I thought that everything was worked out.  However, I think I am sliming too much.  I've had my worst 2 episodes since fill number 3 on Jan. 12th.  The first episode happened when I was eating out with a couple of friends (who don't know about the band).  I believe that it was a result of eating too fast and not chewing enough.  I have a very hard time remembering I am a banded person once I get out and start socializing at a restaurant.  I know that it is old habit to eat and talk and not be mindful, so I know that I probably brought that one on myself.  It is the first time however that it has resulted in a honest-to-god throw up though.  That was scary and I was incredibly uncomfortable (not to mention the 30 minutes I spent in the bathroom that I had to try to explain to my dinner companions).

The second episode happened on Saturday.  I had my normal protien shake for breakfast around 8am (I have found that I cannot eat solid food in the morning anymore).  Then I met a my girlfriend for brunch/lunch and shopping around 11:30.  We went to a nearby restaurant and I ordered the huevos rancheros (eggs scrambled).  The dish came out (it included eggs, chorizo and black beans on a tortilla smothered in green chili and melted cheese - I know not great).  I was being very mindful and took really small bites of only the egg with green chili and some cheese.  No tortilla. No chorizo.  Just little bites.  I had about 3 small bites - spaced out - and immediately went to the bathroom where I had a sliming/throw up incident to rival the earlier one.  What the hell?  It seems to have gotten to a point that the only food that doesn't cause me to slime is liquid (protien shakes) and mushy (tuna salad).  If it is solid, I almost always slime just a little (if not more).

BUT, I do not have heartburn or GERD and I can drink with no problem (even more than sipping).  So....do I get a teeny unfill?  Or, do I wait it out til my next appt. in April?  I really hate to spend so much time in the bathroom, especially when I am out socializing with friends.  But my level of restriction does not seem to fall in the same catagory as Gen's or some others who have recently had trouble.

What I am concerned about is that even with the difficulty eating solid food, I am not losing weight.  I have stalled out again and not lost any more in the last 2 weeks.  Is it possible that because I cannot eat solids easily that I am stuck because I have been satiating my hunger with sliders?  Would I be better off with a little unfill so I can eat more solids?  Or, am I just a huge woosie?

Any advice would be greatly appreciated.  I am still really trying to learn how to use my band and I am frustrated as hell at this point.

In other news, it was a balmy -14 degrees here in Denver as I drove to work this morning.  Have I ever told you all how much I hate Colorado sometimes?
Be Well

Wednesday, January 26, 2011

Thank You!

I'm a couple days late with this but the ever lovely Black Butterfly, Dawnya and so inspirational Christine at Phoenix Revoloution nominated me for the Stylish Blogger Award.  Thank you so much ladies!!!  I am flattered.  So, I think I need to reveal 7 things about me and nominate 15 more bloggers that I love or have found lately.


7 (obscure) Things About ME!
  1. I am a Libra and I was born in the Year of the Dragon.  This makes me very strong willed but I am also very even keeled.  I like peaceful.  I'm a lover, not a fighter.
  2. I got kicked out of my house when I was 16 and have been supporting myself ever since.  I put myself through college and have a relatively successful career now.  Not the ideal way to get started in life, but it sure makes one grow up fast.
  3. I can pour hot tea into a parfait glass perched on my forehead, foot and behind my back.  A little trick I had to learn (quickly) when I waited tables at a Morracan restaurant.
  4. I appeared on a couple of episodes of Work in Progress - a show that used to be on HGTV.  I LOVE doing home improvement projects.
  5. I'm a giver.  I like to give gifts randomly (picking up things when I see something that reminds me of someone.)  I like to help friends with their home improvement or organization projects (told you I like DIY projects!).  I think this trait goes way back.  My mother says that when I was about 4 or 5 she was talking to a friend of hers who told her that she was so broke she didn't have 2 nickels to rub together.  Overhearing this, I promptly went upstairs and retrieved my piggy bank which I presented to her.  Even back then I would give you everything I had if I thought you really needed it. 
  6. I'm a TV-aholic.  I love reality shows - mostly competitions like Top Chef, Project Runway, Amazing Race.  I also love HGTV, Food Network, cable series like Dexter, The Big C, True Blood, Sex and the City (I know it's not on anymore but I still loved it) and The Big Bang Theory.  I TOLD you I was an addict.  It's lucky I work in the satellite industry I guess.
  7. I really, really, really want to travel the world.  Someday when I have time and money I want to go to India, Africa, the Seychelles, Costa Rica, Cinque Terra (in Italy), Brazil and pretty much everywhere else.  If I could find someone to do The Amazing Race with me (that I wouldn't want to kill or vice versa) I could get a whole bunch of traveling in.
15 bloggers I love or have recently discovered:
(this is gonna be hard because I follow over 130 of you guys and I love you all!)
  1. Well, I have to say, I just recently discovered Dawnya and even though she nominated me, I have to nominate her right back.
  2. Same goes for Christine.  She is the first blogger whose entire blog I read beginning to end.  She is always full of great suggestions and, because of her, I am completely paranoid the my port will protrude eventually ;-)
  3. Catherine is wonderful and living the big city life I always wished I had had the guts to go for.
  4. Amy W. kills me.  Have to admit I have a little girl crush on her.
  5. Gen - my Colorado neighbor who shares the same doctor and whose experiences have taught me to only go to the wonder PA, Dawn, the port whisperer.  One of these days we will finally meet in person!
  6. Read - whose MIL stories slay me.  OMG, she and my MIL belong together.
  7. Tina who sent me a wonderful, cushy bike seat
  8. Sherry whose writing style is so wonderful. I just wish she posted more frequently.
  9. Maybe this Time - who is practically my band twin
  10. BG at The Sweet Spot - So inspirational.  Can't wait til her book is published and I get to read it.
  11. Mimi at The Big Fat Bet - just found her yesterday and love her already
  12. Robin - another Colorado blogger.  I haven't met you but I am so impressed with your success!
  13. Cindylew - Where are you girl?
  14. The other Amy.  Again, you haven't been around that much lately but I love it when you show up.
  15. Dinnerland - always so supportive.
I could go on and on.  If I didn't list you I swear it is only because I ran out of room and because I need to wrap this up.  Now I have to inform everyone I nominated.  Yikes.  So much to do, so little time (while at work).

Thanks again to Christine and Dawnya.  I truly appreciate the sentiment.  I am not the most prolific blogger but I am trying.  This is going to be a long journey and I need all the support I can get from my (mostly sisters) in bandedness.

Monday, January 24, 2011

Monday Blues

Happy Monday everone (well, as happy as a Monday can be).  I just noticed that I am averaging about 1 post per week in the new year.  This is not good.  I read everyone elses post religiously but don't seem to find much inspiration for writing my own.  I guess I am not feeling all that interesting.

My weight this week was the same as last.  Not sure if it is related to TOM, or if I am just continuing along on my massively glacial weight loss movement.  I know I should just be grateful that I am going in the right direction but it is sooooo slow.  (Over 40 and peri-meneposal does not make for rapid weight loss.)

I'm feeling a little sad that Read's MIL has gone home.  I am sure she doesn't share my sentiments but her presence does make for great reading.

I'm headed to the gym tonight for the Group Centergy class.  It is a combo of yoga and pilates with some squats and lunges mixed in.  I have actually found it more challenging than my Group Power class - which is just a group weight lifting class.  I think I am going to stay late tonight and get a steam in.  Things at home are not so good so there is no sense in running home.

On the band front...restriction seems good.  I became insanely tight when TOM hit late last week.  Seems to be easing up a bit but I do get stuck on solid foods at a pretty regular rate.  I know I must not be too tight since I have no problem with liquids or mushies so I am convinced it is just me still eating too fast or not chewing enough.  I am so jealous of Lap Band Gal who has never PB'd and still managed to lose over 100 lbs.  Crazy!

Hope everyone is well.  I promise I will try to blog more.  Have a great week!

Sunday, January 16, 2011

Thursday, January 13, 2011

Baby Fill and a Little Gift I Left My Brother

Good Afternoon Everyone!

I just thought I would check in and report that I had fill number 3 yesterday.  It was a little one compared to the first 2 (4CCs and 1.4CCs) .  This time, Dawn the fabulous PA, just gave me .2CCs.  I had a lot of sliming after the last fill (although the last couple of weeks I have been able to eat more normally again).  So she thought it would be best just to "top me off" and see how if goes.  So far, so good.  I really am grateful to have a wonderful PA who really knows what she is doing giving me my fills.  It takes a lot of stress out of the situation.

I am so hoping this fill will help me break through my plateau.  I have been kissing onderland (got down to 200.9 last week before bouncing back to 202) for several weeks.  Unfortunately, this is the weight that I plateaued at the last couple of times I seriously dieted and I am wondering if I have some kind of mental block or if I am self-sabataging.  I really, really, want to get below 200 so I can feel like I am making this band work for me.  I have not been below 200 since 2007 so it is a huge goal for me. 

In order to try to break my plateau, I rejoined my old gym last week.  I went last week and lifted weights on my own and did some cardio.  Back in the day, I used to be quite the gym rat so I have a number of old weight lifting routines from when I worked out with a trainer.  I thought it couldn't hurt to recycle them.  Monday I went and took a class called "Group Centergy".  It is a mix of yoga and pilates with some squats and lunges thrown in.  Kind of an interesting combo but it must have done the trick because my legs have been screaming at me ever since.  I am going back to that class tomorrow night.  Tonight I am taking Balletone. 

On another note, I thought I would post a few pictures of a little present I left my big brother when I was in San Francisco remodeling his daughter's room (pics in earlier post).  My brother is pretty territorial when it comes to his man cave/office (which is really no cave since it is on the 3rd floor of the house).  Anyway, I have been begging him for years to let me spruce it up and trick it out but he won't let me touch it.  (I'm sure he is worried that I am going to find some hidden porn stash or something).  Anyway, just because he won't let me "do" his room doesn't mean I couldn't leave a little something behind to remind him that I am thinking of him.  Meet kitty.
Just Hanging Out
 Above your desk
 To remind you that your sister was here
And since we all know how unobservant guys can be sometime, I just put it there to wait and see how long it would take him to notice.  Let's just say, he was surprised :-)

Hope everyone is having a great week!

(You can click on the pictures if you want to see them bigger.  I love the cat's expression.)


Sunday, January 9, 2011

What I Did on My Vacation. Plus - Word of the Year and BYOC

Hi All,
I have been amazingly lazy lately when it comes to blogging.  I finally caught up on everyone elses and I have been commenting here and there although not nearly enough.  Hope you can forgive me for being such a slacker.
 
Some of you may remember that I was going to remodel my niece's bedroom for her Birthday/Christmas present.  Well,  guess what I did for my vacation????  From Dec. 26-31 I shopped, built furniture, stenciled, installed and decorated.  I took my mother to San Francisco with me to be my assistant.  We had a good time and I think it turned out pretty well.  Here are some before and after pics for your viewing enjoyment.
Before
 After
 Bed Before
 Bed After
 Bay Window Before
 Bay Window After
 Before
 After
 Before
 After
 Before
 After
 And some of the little details:
 Bamboo Stencil
 Ledge Detail
Magnetic Boxes
 
I left the day before they returned from vacation but I understand that she really likes it.
I've been thinking alot about my my word for this year should be.  I know it is not terribly original but I have settled on (drum roll please)
 
Perseverance 

per·se·ver·ance 

–noun
1.steady persistence in a course of action, a purpose, a state, etc., esp. in spite of difficulties, obstacles, or discouragement.
2. Theology . continuance in a state of grace to the end, leading to eternal salvation.
 

1.  doggedness, steadfastness. Perseverance, persistence, tenacity, pertinacity  imply resolute and unyielding holding on in following a course of action. Perseverance  commonly suggests activity maintained in spite of difficulties or steadfast and long-continued application: Endurance and perseverance combined to win in the end.  It is regularly used in a favorable sense. Persistence,  which may be used in either a favorable or an unfavorable sense, implies unremitting (and sometimes annoying) perseverance: persistence in a belief; persistence in talking when others wish to study. Tenacity,  with the original meaning of adhesiveness, as of glue, is a dogged and determined holding on. Whether used literally or figuratively it has favorable implications: a bulldog quality of tenacity; the tenacity of one's memory. Pertinacity,  unlike its related word, is used chiefly in an unfavorable sense, that of overinsistent tenacity: the pertinacity of the social climber.

I have been struggling with very slow weight loss.  I know that because I started my journey at a lower BMI than many of my fellow bloggers that my weight loss might be slower.  However, that doesn't make this any less frustrating and in the past, this is where I would have bailed on my weight loss efforts.  However, with the band, I have a much larger incentive to work through my frustration and successfully meet my goals.  But is it going to take PERSEVERANCE.  That is what I will concentrate on this year and hopefully, keeping that in mind, I will meet my goals.

Finally, I thought I would participate in Draz's BYOC.  Thanks, Draz!

1.  If you could have only three electrical items/appliances...what would they be?  (Um...whose gonna be the first to say you know what?  (Perverts - all of you!!))
  1. My TV.  So sad to admit but I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE my TV.  I am a true child of the 70s.  I am addicted to Reality show competitions - Amazing Race, Top Chef, Project Runway, etc.  So, can't give up my beloved TV.  Plus, TV is how I make my living so I really can't do without.
  2. My laptop.  How would I blog otherwise?  How would I research effectively?  How would I keep up with all of you wonderful folks without it?  Yep, laptop is definitely a keeper.
  3. VitaMix.  I have a protein shake for breakfast every morning for breakfast. I could always eat out or order out every other meal so I think I could live without a fridge and range - but not my VitaMix.
(oh, and Draz, that is  battery operated ;-)


2.  What do you think Satan's middle name is? 

Dick

3.  Name two things you are VERY good at.  (Again - can't wait for these answers)
  1. Organization.  I love to organize.  When I had my interior design company one of the things I loved to do was go in and help people purge and organize their spaces.  I can throw things out, donate, sell, whatever with the best of 'em.  I hate clutter!
  2. I'm a great friend.  I love my friends passionately.  If we are friends, I will do almost anything for you (as long as it doesn't involve enabling unhealthy behaviors - think alcoholism, etc.).  I'll support you, provide a shoulder to cry on, be your biggest cheerleader, bring you soup when you are sick, laugh with you, cry with you, come to your Tupperware (or whatever you are selling) parties, tell you how beautiful, wonderful, strong and smart that you are.  I'm a good, true and honest friend.


4.  What is your favorite sundae topping?

Hot, hot fudge.  Nummy!!!!

5.  Summarize your life in blog land and in real life this week.
 
I've been up and down.  Earlier this week, I hit my all time low (1 pound from onederland).  But now I am back up a pound.  It has been slow and frustrating.  Part of it is due to poor choices on my part.  I have not been as diligent as I could be.  On the other hand, I have not gorged or even over-eaten anything (my band is way to tight for that).  But I think part of it is that this is a weight I have plateaued at before.  The last 2 times I dieted, this is where I got stuck and ultimately gave up.  I will not give up this time because my new word is PERSEVERANCE!
 
I also rejoined my old gym this past week.  It is only 1 mile from my new job so I am hoping to make it there at least 4 times per week,  I also got 2 personal training sessions and one Pilates reformer class included in my enrollment so I will be meeting with my trainer next week.  Yippee!
 
I promise I will try to be a more consistent blogger.  Thanks to everyone for their continued support.  I do appreciate it.